New Years resolutions; self promises that are almost certain to be broken. Diets drift off, gym memberships pass renewal, and by the end of the year, most have resolved only to make another, less lofty resolution. Don’t waste your time with trivial dos or wonts this year. Instead, resolve only to make it to Dada Land for an annual self help prescription courtesy of Dada Life and their expert team. The NY Times says you’ll break these resolutions, but Dada and the gang will make sure you start day 1 of 365 with your best Converse forward.
Resolution #1: Travel to New Places - Pierce Fulton
Not only are we traveling into a new year, but also into the deep trenches of Dada Land. If this is your first time here, then prepare for the ride of your life. First, stamp your ticket at the door. Then, let the conductor Pierce Fulton take you beyond the realms of ordinary life into a place full of swirling melodies and emanating, uplifting vibes. Dada says you have to arrive beautiful before you leave ugly. This is how you arrive beautiful.
Resolution #2: Be Less Stressed – Bassjackers
A lot of people use exercise and physical exertion to relieve stress. Bassjackers are 2 of those people. With alleviating drops and sweating percussive builds, you won’t need a stress ball or membership to find an inner peace in this part of Dada Land; liberation from self is this London-born duo’s specialty. So is jackin’ da bass.
Resolution #3: Quit Smoking – Deniz Koyu
Leave your bong at home, because Deniz Koyu’s Bong has you covered. Sure, the same feeling of elation won’t be identical, but Koyu’s hit works in the opposite manner; to get you moving faster rather than slowing you down. Most importantly, it has no effect on your throat or lungs, but may result in a serious case of black, hairy Tung.
Resolution #4: Eat Healthier & Diet – Dada Life
Bananas: 120 calories. Champagne: 91 calories per glass. Repeat. Forget the nutritional pyramid and stick to the Dada diet of fruits and alchs. We know staying trim is hard enough as it is, therefore tonight, a simple 2-item regimen is all you need. So c’mon and feed the Dada.